Panic in the Studio

cruiseorbecruised:

gayinterest:

FULL PIECE ON OUT.COM

When you read enough of these types of messages/headlines/announcements, you start to believe you ARE NOT desirable, not sexy, not worth anyone’s attention …this type of message can be extremely painful….maybe thats just me, what’s really sad is when this is posted on/in another asians profile….it happens.  BUT no matter who writes this, it’s hurtful and destructive!

Sexual Racism SUCKS.

desire is NEVER politically correct, as my amazing instructor/mentor Millie Wilson would constantly remind me…but you don’t have to be an insensitive asshole about your desires either.

i have written about this before, and am repeating myself, but if you are one of those rolling their eyes, saying “oh god”, thinking this is not an issue, do ME a favor, unfollow me…i really don’t want assholes following my tumblr.

It’d be even nice just to be treated with some tact. Being told that you’re not their “type” is a degree or two more acceptable than some pretty terrible scenarios.

The first being unable to conceal their surprise at any variance of ethnicity. We exist, we aren’t out to fool you, we’re just looking for the same things as anyone else. Nor are we some alien species that can’t tell when the reception cools.

The second, more subtle situation, is when the other person can’t seem to let go of the topic. I don’t know how many times I’ve been grilled about my genealogy, or if they’re curious about some cultural aspect that isn’t on the table for a first impression. There is a difference between attraction, obsession, and being twisted into an “exotic” (their word) object for topical discussion—and even that is putting it kindly. Finally, there is the callousness of no explanation, which is just as bad as a fumbled explanation.

All it requires is a bit of respect, some fairly neutral shared topics for discussion, and there’s no need to set up expectation on either side.

Personal preference is fine, the fault of not fitting that preference should not be on another person. Being online should be no different in some ways than being in public, especially with some privilege of access to someone’s private life. It can be easy to forget that common courtesy still applies but that doesn’t make it acceptable.

(via taiho)